Assessment Centres and Initial Thoughts

(Image is of a person in a suit holding a handbag leaping towards a hill with the word “JOB” on it at sunset.)

(CN discrimination, ableism, masking)

Hello everyone,

As part of my preparation for life after I graduate, I have been spending some time throughout my last year at university learning about the graduate recruitment system that I would have to deal with to get a job at a major employer. The workshop I attended recently was about assessment centres and what I would have to deal with. This is a long post hence it’s split into two pages however I hope there is something here that could help autistic jobseekers.

Please bear in mind that while I have not actually been to an assessment centre, I but I left the session in a meltdown. I felt that trying to engage with the typical graduate recruitment system isn’t feasible for me period. The very thought of it fills me with anxiety. When I have to deal with how inaccessible it is, I enter meltdowns. I already had this before when I attended a previous workshop on video interviews (and how some recruiters are starting to use AI to assess candidates) as well as another workshops on when I was asked to discuss my strengths and weaknesses.

I am going to discuss some of the major points brought up in this session, my thoughts on it and how they make the recruitment process inaccessible for those diagnosed as autistic and/or ADHD. Note that some of these thoughts will apply to other neurotypes as well as mental illnesses.

The importance of the telephone

This is a major accessibility issue as employers place great importance on the telephone to communicate with potential candidates which of course causes problems if someone is unable to use the telephone in any way. Allow me to elaborate further.

Employer expect candidates to call them to let them know if they running late for interviews/assessments.

A lot of autistic people have huge anxiety calling strangers which includes unexpected phone calls. If an unexpected event happens and the autistic person needs to cancel this demand may be impossible for them to do. This is especially important as employers will expect candidates to ask if it is still ok that they can arrive at the assessment centre at a later time. They may start the assessment without them especially if most other candidates have already arrived. If they are too anxious to use the phone, it is very unlikely that any other form of contact would be accepted. I would assume this includes texts and email as well.

Do not use mobile phones in the waiting rooms for interviews/assessments.

This also relates to issues with how telephones are often used for fidgeting, dealing with nerves or communicating with others. Alternatives for this could work like a fidget cube, but that doesn’t mean misunderstandings won’t happen. The expectations that employers have will include reading various materials in the lobby, watching videos playing on TV as well as talking to other candidates in the area (which can actually add stress for neurodiverse people).

Should phone numbers always be disclosed in applications?

This is something I wondered as a result of the workshop. Although it is expected that phone numbers are given on all applications as a way of being contacted, if somebody won’t answer the call due to anxiety (or another reason), what is the point of giving the prospective employer their number? On the other hand, if a phone number isn’t disclosed on the application would an employer disqualify them immediately for that? I don’t know the answer to that. Either way, this is a huge accessibility issue.

Body language

This is an area where many autistic struggle and employers assess how often you use eye contact as a way to help them assess candidates for their roles. The problem with this is that it negatively discriminates against those that don’t present in a neurotypical way. This of course ties into masking and is one reason why many autistic people learn to do it. However, there are many that can’t or refuse to mask and thus are prone to having their chance taken from them because employers judge them by fixed NT standards. In other words, the very process of recruitment encourages masking.

You can click the the page number below to proceed to the next page.


University Education & Autistic Burnout

Hi all,

Today’s post will be breaking an unintended post drought as I am currently recovering from a burnout during my term at university and I’d like to talk about it in the hope that people will understand it a bit more. The following is written from the perspective of an autistic/ADHD student in the British university education system.

Firstly, I am going to give a brief summary of the UK university education system for the benefit of international readers. This system gives a lot of power to the student. For example, attendance isn’t monitored as strictly as lower down the education ladder. There are also less deadlines overall however the tasks are usually large and contribute larger percentages to your overall grade (ie. x2 2000 word assignment that are 25% of your total grade each, alongside an end of year exam). Exams are also longer and larger than lower down in the education system. Attendance and classroom participation generally is not factored into the overall mark towards modules whereas it is in other countries. In other words, it’s a very laissez-faire style of teaching.

Secondly, for those that don’t know, executive functioning is the ability for somebody to adequately function as a human, mainly revolving around organisation. From an autistic perspective, this mainly involves masking as a neurotypical which is very demanding for those on the spectrum. University is very demanding on executive functioning hence it can be quite difficult for autistic people. An autistic burnout is when this process fails and the autistic person starts regressing on their social skills and overall functioning as a person. This can be shown through tiredness, becoming disconnected from their surroundings and avoiding social interaction (even if it’s important). Other aspects include the deprioritisation of health & hygiene, social life, sleep, time for hobbies/passions or even the degree itself. Burnout also increases the chances of failing and having to drop out of university altogether. This is something that is not uncommon for autistic university students with the workload often overwhelming to the point where they have to drop out for the sake of their health.

In my case, it takes me forever to do my work. My attention span is all over the place as I am essentially learning to work by myself and concentrate which is something that is not often taught lower down in the education system. This especially applies if you go to sixth form rather than college. Social life being deprioritised is a double edged sword. On the bright side, this is a valid reason to avoid potentially overwhelming environments (parties). However, having to pass on attending society activities may mean missed opportunities to make memories/friends. Most of my fresher’s year was spent adjusting to doing assignments and not actually making many friends. This is only compounded by the other difficulties that occur by being autistic. Social skills can be built on in university as well as opens the potential for friendships with other autistic/neurodivergent students as well as international students or even future romantic partners (if interested!).

University is also a very important building block for learning independence skills. Learning to cook, wash, manage money etc. are all important and are also things that aren’t properly taught in school or even by parents/carers. Learning these skills are also demanding on executive functioning and may be more or less demanding than the academic side. There are possible solutions to help with this though – they include living at home and commuting to university daily as well as having preparation at home prior to going to university (even if that means delaying going to university in the first place!). Of course, this depends on the person. Others may wish to not go to uni at all and move straight into work or do something else.

Of course, this hasn’t doesn’t factor in support from universities. This varies widely around the country and the world. Things like mentoring and additional support from university services can literally make the difference between the student succeeding and failing. Mentoring can help with working out how to approach assignments or social situations. Getting the right accommodation for exams is also important which can include carrying them over from GCSE/A-levels. While I didn’t run into many issues, university services can and should aim to do better as not everyone will have a positive experience.

To conclude, burnout in autistic university students is something that exists and should not be underestimated. If you’re at university and you see an autistic student struggling with their degree then this is a possible reason why. This especially applies in the later years when the workload gets more demanding and they have to learn to adjust to this. In my experience I’ve managed to adapt as time has gone by but it is a constant battle. I have a couple of friends and am overall enjoying university.

That’s all for today. I hope to be back on a regular posting schedule soon.

Best wishes,



What’s in a Name?


Hi all,

This is the first post I am making here on my blog “Subtle Writes” therefore it needs to be an important one. So, I thought that I would discuss my thinking behind the name of this blog. After all, a name is after all an important aspect of a site and is critical to the first impressions of my site.

The name essentially is a combination of my ideas behind “Subtle” and “Writes.” “Subtle” was hard to come up with, as I wanted an internet username that I felt matched my life experience to some extent. One word eventually spoke to me metaphorically speaking – that word was “subtle.”

The dictionary definition of “subtle” (via The Free Dictionary) consists of the following.



adj. sub·tler, sub·tlest

  1. So slight as to be difficult to detect or describe; elusive: a subtle smile.
  2. Difficult to understand; abstruse: an argument whose subtle point was lost on her opponent.
  3. Able to make fine distinctions: a subtle mind.
  4. Operating in a hidden, usually injurious way; insidious: a subtle poison.
  5. Archaic – Characterized by skill or ingenuity; clever. Crafty or sly; devious.

I feel that the majority of these definitions matches my life experience. I find some things very difficult to describe sometimes, especially if it is a feeling or another abstract concept that I have not felt before or feels overwhelming. My mind can be very sharp towards the little details sometimes and quite clever though I can also be difficult to understand too.

Continuing on with regards to cleverness this can also lean into the territory of “special interests.” To understand my thinking here, ask yourself this. If you know an autistic person in real life, what are they really passionate/skilled/knowledgeable about to the extent that others know about it and it forms a large part of their identity? For me it’d be something along the lines of “Oh, [Subtle’s] the one who plays those obscure anime games.”

As for the injurious and crafty definitions, I do not feel these apply to my choice behind the name “Subtle” at all. Firstly, I do not believe they match my personality. Secondly, while there are autistic people whom are sly, devious and like to cause injury to others, autism itself is not responsible for that. This is because there are other factors at play that can cause those behaviours to surface such as the way someone is raised and what traits, if any, are inherited from the parents. This also applies to neurotypicals as many of them are sly and devious too.

On the other hand, “Writes” was fairly easy to come up with. My online name is Subtle and I write stuff. Hence “Subtle Writes.” I did consider “Subtle Writing” but then “Subtle” would have a different meaning and it wouldn’t flow as well. I preferred “Subtle Writes” at the end of the day.

Remember as autism is a spectrum it is important to note that no one person’s experience of autism will be the same as another. Everyone is different and this blog’s purpose is to convey one person’s knowledge and experience of living as an autistic person with ADHD to help spread awareness of those conditions. Therefore the name “Subtle Writes” is personal to me and brands my story. Being an actual autistic person means the best perspective I can offer on autism is my own and it has value. That applies to anyone who discusses any physical/mental conditions they have. Hopefully this blog itself will help others to understand autism in general with another case study to help relate it to.

That’s it for today. I’ll be back soon with more content.

Best wishes,

-Subtle (@subtle_writes)